Thursday, June 3, 2010

21 years of facepalm

It's that time of the year when it's all about me. Don't run away though, I'll keep this rant short.

When I was 14, I was crazy about Formula 1 and I loved Schumacher. Today, I'm fond of Formula 1, I like Schumacher and I'm trying to hunt his son down. Back then, I loved watching Cardcaptors. Now, I watch Cardcaptors only when I find its Japanese version. I used to believe Richie Sambora was the best guitarist in the world. Now I don't think twice before saying Petrucci can kick Sambora arse. My behaviour, once termed hyper, is now high. As a teen, I'd regret a lot of things I'd say, often said without internal processing. Now I don't care enough to regret. Then, I was always full of energy and made good of it in athletics. I cared about education. I actually had ambition. And now, I'm ..well, I have energy and make good of it by looking for more food. I drag myself through the process of education. I can't find my ambitions.

Many changes, o'er these years, some trivial, others not so much. Only a few things have stayed constant. My height for instance, but lets not go there.

None of those changes, I had a conscious control over. When I turned 20, I decided to bring about changes that I wanted to see. It's only providing you with redundant information, when I tell you that none of it came through. But I did have exciting plans! I wanted to experiment and go trippin'.Instead, I had paan for the first time and went tripping over electric cables. Did I hear you say facepalm? Well, you're absolutely right.

In fact, I'm pretty sure the doctor who yanked me out into this world 21 years back had a hard time getting my feet out of my mouth, while I hid my face in my hands. Ever since, its been facepalm after facepalm. My parents have even considered using surgical measures to keep my feet out my mouth. 21 years of it all, its been fun. For those who stood at a distance and watched, of course. I'm not too upset myself, I'm sure a lot of things could've been worse. Tough, crazy or blissful-it's at least been interesting all this while.

The legal age for everything is here and I've waited for long. But harder times are to come, people say. I find myself wondering if I'm all set to 'battle the world'. I wonder if I'll ever make a positive difference to my environment, or if I'll fall asleep in a bathtub at 27, without having achieved anything worth talking about. I..

I wonder how much I'm going to cringe when I read this a year from now.

Damn.


9 comments:

Vinay Hegde said...

Well, your state now, about education and ambitions, isn't very uncommon: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quarter-life_crisis :P

You are officially an aunty now! (Okay, I know it's trite and all that, but yeah.)

And yes, damn, you need some vodka. :D

Merin Mandanna said...

Hmmm..interesting. Sounds familiar, yes. :D Except for 'desire to have kids'.

You follow 'aunty' culture too? Thoo. You need vodka too. :D

subbulakshmistoned said...

Alcohol is overrated. But I'd rather you try it once. And this is one of those posts I can connect with.
We're all silent victims of Quarter Life Bitch. Sob.

Akshatha Hegde said...

I wanted to 'drink to get drunk' and go trippin'.
I need vodka.


Got it. Bring orange juice. Will be your partner in crime. For eternity. B-)

@ Hegde:

What are you laughing at? 21.5 years ago, you were a fetus weighing 300g.

(Iwantdoubletreat!)

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Merin Mandanna said...

Swathi, I have more than tried alcohol. :D I'm Coorgi, in the name of God. Just never gone tipsy.
Lets meet together, go fish-pedicur-ing and do away with the sobbing. ;)

Aksie! Guess who's getting Absolut for her birthday. ;) You're invited home. Ladies night, oh yes. :D

Chaitanya said...

Looks like everyone is doing introspection nowadays! Good to know I have company. :)

You know that you are giving some of that exotic stuff to us right?

Akshatha Hegde said...

Bleddy you all have fun and VTU isn't even 'postponing' our exams. Fish pedicuring and all. :(

Chotu, kindly make some time for the second installment of ladies day/night/whatever. Will bring Smirnoff Green Apple. :)

Merin Mandanna said...

Chaitanya, that depends on how nicely you ask. ;)

Aksie, you don't even have to ask. :D